Funniest quotes   | Random quote
  • It's not about how others look at me, it's about how I look at myself
    - Unknown

    Permalink | View | 1890 views
  • Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
    - Herbert Henry Asquith

    Permalink | View | 2138 views
  • you're never too old to become younger.
    - Mae West

    Permalink | View | 2080 views
  • you're everywhere. you're omnivorous.
    - Homer Simpson (To God.)

    Permalink | View | 1898 views
  • You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
    - Homer Simpson

    Permalink | View | 2019 views
  • You just pick up a chord, go twang, and you're got music.
    - Sid Vicious

    Permalink | View | 2173 views
  • You have to be 100% behind someone, before you can stab them in the back.
    - David Brent

    Permalink | View | 1987 views
  • You don't have to be mad to work here, but you do have to be on time, well presented, a team player, customer service focused and sober!
    - David Brent

    Permalink | View | 2112 views
  • You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.
    - Will Rogers

    Permalink | View | 2051 views
  • You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
    - Woody Allen

    Permalink | View | 2100 views
  • Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
    - Oscar Wilde

    Permalink | View | 2120 views
  • Men don't get cellulite. God just might be a man.
    - Rita Rudner

    Permalink | View | 2192 views
  • Women should be obscene and not heard.
    - Groucho Marx

    Permalink | View | 1918 views
  • Women represent the triumph of matter over mind, just as men represent the triumph of mind over morals.
    - Oscar Wilde

    Permalink | View | 2098 views
  • Women have a much better time than men in this world. There are far more things forbidden to them.
    - Oscar Wilde

    Permalink | View | 1974 views
  • Women are as old as they feel - and men are old when they lose their feelings.
    - Mae West

    Permalink | View | 2128 views
  • Woe unto you also, lawyers! for ye lade men with burdens grievous to be borne.
    - Jesus

    Permalink | View | 1957 views
  • Winning isn't everything - it's the only thing.
    - Vince Lombardi

    Permalink | View | 2241 views
  • Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.
    - Woody Allen

    Permalink | View | 2256 views
  • Whenever cannibals are on the brink of starvation, Heaven, in its infinite mercy, sends them a fat missionary.
    - Oscar Wilde

    Permalink | View | 1970 views